Sunday, March 28, 2010


I’m tired. My spirit is fresh, but my body and my mind are exhausted.
My flesh is weak.
Even my heart fails.
My compassion yields.
My sin slaps me.
Satan lies to me.
Poverty crushes me.
Abuse bruises me.
Doubt creeps.
Unbelief gets comfortable.

But Truth does not hide.

You are the strength of my heart.

It’s hard to rebel like Christ.
It’s hard to shun culture.
It’s hard to confront lies.
It’s hard to turn my back on the shiny bits of America that still twinkle in the corners of my mind.

I count them all as loss, all for the sake of my reward.

It’s hard to deny my loves.
It’s hard to turn from the things that consume my heart, good things but not best things.

You are my portion.

It takes zeal to storm the gates.
It takes strength to be on guard.
It takes effort to draw the sword of the Spirit.
It takes trust to walk.
It takes a prayer to get up.
It takes faith to praise for what I have not yet seen.

You are worthy.

Some days I am lustful when real love is beckoning.
Some days discouragement is easier to come by than the faith of Abraham.
Some days I know I could not be the one chosen to advance the kingdom.
Some days I know I would rather just sleep than storm.
Some days I know it is easier to let down my guard.
Some days I know how much more I pursue other lovers.

You are the lover of my soul.

And today I’m just tired.
I am at peace.
I am joyful.
I am content.
And I’m tired.

The kingdom, the power, the glory. Forever.

1 comment:

  1. Most Precious Angel,
    I have been planting beautiful flowers the last couple of days-perennials that I can enjoy next year and after and as I was sitting on the patio and watching the sunset and admiring the beauty of the flowers and the awesome trees and listened to the many different birds each with its own unique voice, I was thinking of you and rejoicing in the experience and just knowing that you appreciate and love all of creation-as I do- and it was as if you were there with me--enjoying it with me--It's funny because I remember feeling close to you in that same way last year on your second trip to Zambia when I would sit and relax in the late afternoon watching the sunset, marveling at the trees and the birds. It is such a comfort to know that some things stay the same--and most importantly, that God always remains the same. He is always there to comfort-Oh the joy of feeling His presence in all that we can see and revel in. You have found it there in the children-His precious children-seeing His light in them and how marvelous it is!! I feel your excitement and your great love for them and I hope you know how it brightens each day for me to be able to share that with you. We are truly blessed! I love you so very much! I pray God's protection and guidance and comfort and joy and peace for you every day! Love you!! Mom